The handy dandy 5 step cure to what ails you
Left to our own devices, we are never better than our list of rules. Right and wrong discussions lead precisely nowhere. Here are 5 ways to step out of this swamp, giving you the chance to free yourself, and let others be.
Small, Consistent Steps
Sure, everyone knows: “Rome wasn’t built in a day,” “The road to anywhere begins with the first step,” or even, “Begin with the end in mind.”
So, why is this Zen Living, this making changes, this doing life differently, such a struggle?
There are four things that hinder us: finger pointing, stubbornness, lethargy, and magical thinking. Today, we explore each, and propose a small, consistent step.
10 Ways to Deepen Your Relationship
Elegant Dialog takes communication to a new level of self-responsible relating. None of this comes easily. That being said, here are 10 exercises that will take your relationship from stuck to soaring.
5 Communication Tips
Virtually all “couple issues” are communication issues. Superficially, the topic may be finances, sex, child-rearing, or whatever, but underlying it all is the quality and regularity of the couple’s communication. Let’s look at a few things that might help you improve in this area.
Zen for the Holidays - 10 Tips
“How often I found where I should be going only by setting out for somewhere else.” ~ R. Buckminster Fuller
Nothing ups the ante for family drama better than ‘going Home for the Holidays.’ (You really need to see the movie…)
Typically, past dramas are minimized as people play the ‘this year it will be different’ game. People expect Normal Rockwell gatherings, when “those gathered ’round” more closely resemble the Bunkers.
There are ways to change the game, but only if you decide to end the old game, AND replace it with something Zen.
The Courage to be Happy
Given society’s propensity to think that ‘love’ should automatically equal happiness, it’s a brave thing indeed to suggest that the real source of happiness is courage.
Why is this so?
Well, there’s a progression of silliness that is common to most relationships. It begins at the ‘falling in love’ stage, when everything seems so perfect. The biological imperative sets in, and the quirks in each others’ behaviour are painted over.
As time goes by, (six months is usually about the standard time) a bit more ‘reality’ sets in. The things not noticed in the romance of falling in love begin to emerge. What’s really happening is that a certain level of comfort has been reached, and the parties are more willing to be who they really are.
Zen Based, Present Living
