Real Relating
Couples often tell me, “I want to work on our relationship. I typically look around the room, then look confused, and finally say, “OK, I’ll work on it… but where is it? Can you bring it along the next time? Because at the moment, all I see are two individuals, who apparently have trouble relating.”
The handy dandy 5 step cure to what ails you
Left to our own devices, we are never better than our list of rules. Right and wrong discussions lead precisely nowhere. Here are 5 ways to step out of this swamp, giving you the chance to free yourself, and let others be.
It’s All / It’s Not About You
Many are the people who think that the world isn’t treating them right. I hear this one especially as I counsel couples. There they sit, balefully glaring at each other, vainly hoping I’ll declare a winner. Each rattles off a litany of what the other is doing wrong. Sometimes, one or the other will tell me, with great righteousness, “Everyone knows that relationships should be easy. When you find the right person, (s)he will meet all your needs, without asking, and everything will be perfect.”
This is egotism.
Zen Based, Present Living
