Finding Yourself

More detailed info on the theory and practice of Zen Bodywork Psychotherapy.

How much of this fits, for you?

• You are a professional person, and you remember being motivated and excited by your career. Lately, however, it seems that you do what you do out of habit, with little joy.

• Your relationships, which used to be a source of pleasure, now seem boring, annoying or lifeless.

• There was a time when you thought there was a reason for your being alive. Now, you wonder if life has any meaning at all.

• Physically, you remember a time when you could do what you wanted when you wanted, with little ill effect. Now, you seem to injure yourself more easily, your aches and pains are long lasting and you are noticing a rigidity to your body.

• Sexually, you are losing interest, or, more ominously, sex is almost all that is good about your relationship.

And so, you've tried:

• vitamins, exercise, yoga, the gym, workshops, classes, motivational tapes and books.

You've considered:

• ending your relationship, 

• quitting your job, 

• running away, 

• hiding under your comforter, 

• having an affair, 

• drinking or doing drugs (prescription or recreational) 

• going on a diet.

You've thought:

• you're worthless, irresponsible, lost, confused, bored, in need of a life or stressed.

Now, for the bad news:

There is no cure for what ails you.
Outside of yourself.

And, for the good news:

There is no cure for what ails you,
outside of yourself.

So, you wondering what the lists mean? It means you are discovering that everything you believe to be true about you -- about your body, your mind, your spirit, your career -- is not necessarily true.

Because we live in the West, our approach tends to be to break things down into components. The Scientific Method assumes that, if only we break a thing down far enough, we'll arrive at "why" it is as it is.

In terms of our selves, we look for what is broken. We then make a case for the broken element being the cause of the problem. So, for example, a Western doctor might say that you are sick because you caught a virus. She would then prescribe something for the virus.

Or, you might assume that your distress is caused by your partner, your upbringing, your genetics, bad luck, the present government, the state of the world. You might then attempt to "fix" your problem.

A wise Chinese Doctor friend of mine once asked me why I had the flu. I went on about the flu bug that was floating around. he replied, "Yes. But why do YOU have the flu?" And I began to see that I needed to ask another set of questions. Questions about the choices I was making. Questions about how I was seeing my life.

From there, over the past several years, I have studied , wrote about and taught my clients (and myself!) to look at how they are living out their lives. We teach a way of life. As such, we do not seek "cures" so much as we seek understanding.

Primarily, I want my clients to understand that:

All That You Are is a Product of What You Have Thought.

Therapy is an inward journey that leads to a change in outward approach. We begin by exploring where you are stuck, what patterns of thought and behaviour re-emerge, and how you hold your pain, tension and hurts in your body.

I work from a wholeness perspective. There is an essential unity (whether you recognize it or not) between your body, mind, spirit and your social and physical environment. As you experience mental confusion and lose a sense of purpose and meaning, you will immediately notice (if you look) a 'negative' change in your relationships and especially changes in your body.

So, the headaches, stiff neck, tight back, acid stomach, irritable bowel, lower back pain, sexual changes and difficulties are as much a result of your relationship with others and your relationship with yourself as they are due to, say a faulty golf swing or you mother's genetic makeup.

The bottom line is:

Nothing will change until you learn
to make better choices. 
These choices are life shattering and life changing. 
I describe them as Joining the Realm of Self-responsibility.

The final arbiter of your life is you. You are not enacted upon by outside persons or forces, unless you choose to see the world that way. You are not a victim of anyone or anything, unless you choose to see the world that way. You are not condemned to repeat past failures, unless you believe that you are. At each and every moment, we believe, there is choice.

At The Phoenix Centre, you have choice.

I follow no cookie cutter approaches. My interventions are tailored to your needs and wishes. My goal is to provide you with a safe environment in which to explore, experiment and learn. You will be confronted with yourself, and encouraged to dig deep. You will find support and encouragement every step of the way. You will find your own answers, your own meaning and your own direction.

As I am trained in several counselling modalities, we will find an approach that leads you inward and takes you out into a world that you will create. I will teach you powerful relaxation techniques, geared towards helping you to find inner peace and tranquility. Additionally, we will look at the muscular holding patterns you have developed, which restrict and act upon the energy flow in your body. If you wish, we can decide upon specific techniques designed to restore the flow of energy while loosening "body armour."

Body armour is a term that describes rigidity in the body's muscles. From an eastern perspective, it might also be described as a restriction in the flow of chi, or energy. However you look at it, as the body tightens, or restricts energy, aches, pains, loss of mobility and illness are the inevitable result. We believe that emotional and physical trauma never simply go away. They are captured in the body and turned into body and character armour. As such, they restrict you, and block others from being in true relationship with you.

We explore the body's armour through Bodywork. Bodywork theory assumes that there is much to learn about you by the way you walk, sit and carry yourself. We help you to look at what you are doing to your body, and can help you to re-align yourself, re-establishing energy flow and releasing tightness. We do this descriptively, and, if you choose, through body release techniques and proper breathing.

Many clients come to The Phoenix Centre to deal with headaches or other body aches. After your physician has ruled out physical causes, we look at relaxation techniques and Bodywork. If however, you wish to deal with the root cause of your physical pain, we recommend counselling. We'll look at your beliefs, your way of communicating, your process of decision-making. We'll explore what works and what doesn't -- on the basis of what satisfies you.

Others come because of relationship breakdown or difficulties, depression or anger management. We begin with counselling, and then look at how the non-helpful behaviours are impacting on the client's body. Or not. It's your choice.

We look at what you choose to look at. But unlike many therapists, I am trained and proficient at looking at all of you. Body, mind, spirit, relationships.

Your life is in your hands, and yours alone. If you are waiting for external situations and other people to change so that you can be happy, you are in for a long wait and a less than fulfilling life.

On the other hand, you can learn what you can change, what you can't and how to have a life filled with good health and deeper meaning.

Only with Wayne C. Allen, at The Phoenix Centre.

Why not call today?

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