Wayne C. Allen - a simple Zen guy - writes about living and relating elegantly
Blame and the Guilt Button — people use blaming as a weapon — using guilt as a way to manipulate others into doing their bidding. The cure? Self-responsibility. Psst! Hey! ** Want more great writing designed to help YOU to shift your behaviour? ** Want to learn how to find, build or deepen your principal … Read more
Owning Your Life We’ve been conditioned since birth to blame — to make others responsible for who and where we are, and to let ourselves off the hook. Self-responsibility is all about turning the light on your behaviours and understandings, and accepting that what you do and who you are is a solo act.
why and but are stop words. They are useful for getting us off-track, as we pretend to be working on our issues. Uttering either means that you are stuck, pure and simple.
Self responsibility is the first step in gaining freedom from the drama you have been creating.
It does not help anything to judge a situation good or bad, or to blame what you are experiencing on others. Declaring something bad is a philosophical game.
Unbinding is disentangling yourself from your wacky thoughts. We all have them. Blaming, chiding, criticizing, ornery thoughts. Change comes at a price, and the price is actually doing something.
Especially in the West, vulnerability is considered a weakness. This is taught to us by our parents and tribes, who are, of course, concerned for our safety. However, this fear of vulnerability is ingrained at a deep level, to our detriment, once we become adults. (This is one reason most adults aren’t!)