Now, compassion is yet another misunderstood word. Compassion is sometimes equated with “feeling sorry for,” and is often used as a bludgeon — “If you had an ounce of compassion, you’d look after me and do what I want.”
And yet, in the Zen world, the compassionate act could be a kick in the ass. It’s often abrupt, and direct, and challenging.

Healing the Mind — Body Split

I’m suggesting that you examine your emotional list, and discover what you’re clinging to.
Emotions, in and of themselves, do not mean anything. Thoughts, in and of themselves, do not mean anything. You are not your thoughts, and you are not your emotions.
Emotions & Thoughts are things you have, not things that you are.
Letting go of clinging is all about detaching from identifying with these internal processes.

The Complexity of Simplicity

Perhaps nothing is more important than truly grasping the paradoxical nature of reality. Most of us hate paradox—we want things to be simple, predictable, and emphatically, we want things to be the way we think they ought to be. Flying in the face of our little foot-stomping rants about how things ‘ought to be’ is ‘how things are.’ I call this side of the equation reality.