Dropping the Excuses

The Buddha said some variant of, “All that you are is a product of what you have thought.” He meant that how we think determines our self-identity and our view of the world. It’s not the ‘right’ view, but rather how we frame our reality. Once we get the joke that the frame is warped by our perceptions, we can have a laugh and let it go.

Clearing Relationship Gunk

What I am trying to ‘sell’ here is the idea that all you can do is all you can do. It is never your job to point out what your partner is doing wrong (who do you think you are, their mommy or daddy?????) Figuring themselves out is your partner’s job. If your partner has no interest in this job, then you have to choose whether to stay. But, before you run away (again!) turn your attention to your own behaviour, and ask yourself this: “Is my current behaviour impeccable — is it designed to deepen my side of the relationship?”